


The Promise

by RoseliaRinRin



Category: BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Fluff, Established Relationship, F/F, I love MocaRan so much, I’m new here how do I tag properly?, Set in winter even though it’s baking outside, Some graphic descriptions of injuries, these tags are a mess oopsie, what am i even doing?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-04-12 11:21:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19131004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseliaRinRin/pseuds/RoseliaRinRin
Summary: ‘Ran truly felt at bliss in that moment, warm and safe in Moca’s arms, surrounded by her scent that reminded her of freshly baked pastries, with a slight waft of lemon hiding in there. Lying there, the two girls forgot about the world around them, and time lost it’s meaning. Rather than focusing on the sudden pain clenching her heart, Ran let Moca’s love envelop her, feeling warm all the way from her head right down to her toes.’Ran and Moca decide to spend the last day of the year together, surrounded by each other’s love. Yet despite the warmth that fills her heart, an equally as strong pain clutches it. Just why is Ran feeling this way?And why is she so scared to take her eyes off Moca for even a second?A New Year’s miracle or a New Year’s disaster, read on to find out how this day shrouded in mystery ends.





	The Promise

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! Sorry if it sounds as if I don’t what I’m doing, I made this account just so I could post this story on here ahaha. This story was originally posted on the Bandori Amino, but I wanted to contribute to the Mocaran stories on here so I decided to post it here too!
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Soft sunlight began to sip in through the curtain covered windows, lightly bathing the face of a certain black haired vocalist with a rebellious red streak in her hair. The light caused the girl to slightly open her eyes, but overcome with exhaustion she buried her face deeper into her pillow, trying to fall back to sleep. That plan was doomed to fail however, as a few seconds later her bedroom door was thrown open.

 

“Good morning~” Ran thought she heard those words being uttered by a familiar voice, but she was too out of it to fully process them. She thought she heard faint giggling, before she was hit by a wave of coldness. Her eyes slammed open, and Ran saw that her warm blanket had been yanked off her. Upon looking up she saw the thief was indeed-

 

 “Moca!” Ran exclaimed, glaring at the silver haired trickster girl, who only just smirked back at her.

 

“Raaaaaan, you promised to wake up early today remember? Tsk tsk tsk, are you really going to break your promise to the sweet Moca-chan? Ohhhh the pain!” Continuing with her theatrics, Moca threw herself on the bed, lying next to Ran. The vocalist grumbled in response, but her words of protest were soon forgotten when Moca turned her head to look at her. Looking into those sparkling blue-green eyes, Ran could not find it in her to say anything, opting rather to cover her scarlet coloured cheeks with her hands. In response to her action, Ran heard the silver haired guitarist laugh, and though she sent her a glare in response, Ran couldn’t ignore the fluttering of her heart when she heard Moca’s soft laughter float across the still room.

In an attempt to change the subject, Ran spoke up, cringing when her voice slightly wavered, “so, why exactly am I meant to be waking up this early?”

Moca pouted, poking Ran’s face, “ehhhhh, don’t tell me you forgot? Ahhh, I’m truly wounded Ran~”

“Yes, yes,” Ran replied, rolling her eyes, but she could feel her lips curving upwards as if being pulled by invisible strings, “seriously though, what’s the reason.”

Moca sighed dramatically, “well, I suppose I’d better tell you, since Ran was such a meanie and forgot her promise! Ahhh, you should be thankful that the beautiful Moca-chan is so kind~” And there it was, that trademark smirk of hers. Ran tried to convince herself that it was annoying, opting to send the girl a mild glare, but her heart seemed to have other ideas, if the sudden increase in her pulse was anything to go by, “alright, alright, I’ll tell you, so no need to keep scrunching up your face like that, my little rebellious Ran~” Moca teased, lightly pulling the red streak of hair of the vocalist, but being surprisingly gentle when tucking it back behind Ran’s ear, her hands lingering on Ran’s skin a second longer than they needed to, “today is a a special day Ran~”

“Special day?” Ran couldn’t seem to remember the date at all.

“Hmmm~ it’s New Year’s Eve silly!”

Furrowing her eyebrows, Ran reached over to grab her phone, her eyes quickly seeking to confirm the date. It was indeed the 31st of December, and Ran couldn’t help but be surprised that she had forgotten about such a big day. Then again, she wasn’t a morning person, so perhaps her tired brain was still not functioning properly.

“Seeee, the great Moca-chan was right!” Moca smiled triumphantly.

“So it seems... ahh, I can’t believe I didn’t remember the date,” Ran confessed, looking off to the side in slight embarrassment, feeling her cheeks heat up a little.

Ran was surprised when she felt soft, calloused fingers on her face, slowly turning it so that the vocalist was looking into those blue-green eyes again. Even more so, Ran was surprised to see those eyes holding an uncharacteristic softness and tenderness in them. Met with such a sight, with her heart blooming in her chest, she couldn’t do much more than just freeze as she continued to look into those eyes that she loved so much.

“Well, it’s alright-y that you forgot Ran, because you can make it up to Moca-chan starting right now~” Even though the words were spoken in a teasing tone, as per usual of the guitarist, what was unusual was the warmth and love that coated her sentence.

“M-make it u-up?” Ran couldn’t help but stutter as she replied. She wanted to turn away and hide her burning cheeks, but Moca’s soft hands held her face gently in place... well, Ran doubted she had the power to look away from those magnetic eyes that had her utterly captivated.

“Hmmm~,” Moca hummed in response, slowly leaning in towards the vocalist. Ran’s heart began to beat even quicker, almost as if was about to break free from its confines in her chest, as she felt Moca’s warm breath on her lips. Out of instinct, Ran closed her eyes, lips parting slightly as she tensely awaited for Moca’s to connect with hers...

Only to hear some faint giggling.

Opening her eyes, Ran saw Moca shaking with laughter, her eyes closed.

“M-Moca!!” Ran protested, her voice an octave higher than usual. That only fueled Moca’s laughter, but after a few more seconds the girl in question opened her eyes, looking back at Ran,  her body still slightly shaking with concealed laughter.

“Ahh, I’m sorry Ran, but you’re just too cute when you get all flustered like that~”

“Arg, Moca you’re the worst!” Ran complained, violently turning her face so it was buried into her pillow. She heard some faint laughter again, and then felt Moca’s breath next to her reddened ear. 

“I’m really sorry Ran,” Ran shivered slightly at the feeling of Moca’s lips so close to her ear, her warm breath tickling her skin, “I just couldn’t help but be a bit selfish there, you really are cute like that you know~”

Ran could only grumble in response, much to the amusement of the silver haired girl. Still, even through her annoyance Ran couldn’t help but lean into Moca’s hand when it was brought back down to cup her face.

“Raaaaan, won’t you look at your cute girlfriend~”

Though she was terribly embarrassed, Ran complied, and was once again captivated by Moca’s eyes... but not just her eyes, she was also entranced by Moca’s pale, smooth skin, by her soft, fluffy hair, and most of all by her red, plump lips.

Taking the initiative this time, Ran cupped Moca’s cheeks, leaning in and allowing her eyes to close in the process. While Ran felt like teasing Moca too as payback, her desire to kiss the guitarist overpowered that thought.

Before she knew it, the two of them were kissing, and Ran felt her heart soar. They started off gently, growing accustomed to the intense sensations, but soon they picked up the pace, lips dancing furiously together as the two seeked to feel each other’s presence and love.

They did, however, eventually need to breathe, so they separated. Still, they remained with their faces close to each other, their foreheads leaning against each other’s. 

“Ran? Hey now, it’s ok.”

It wasn’t until Moca’s concerned voice reached her ears that Ran realised she was crying softly. Tenderly, Moca wiped away Ran’s tears with her thumbs, surprisingly slow and gentle. Ran didn’t know why she was crying, but she felt her throat closing up and her tears falling faster at seeing Moca being so gentle with her. Ran didn’t want Moca’s beautiful eyes to hold worry in them, but she couldn’t help the sudden sadness and... nostalgia that seemed to wash over her.

“I-I’m s-sorry” Ran croaked out.

“There’s no need to apologise, Ran...” Moca smiled sadly, her fingers still gently wiping away Ran’s tears. Moca attempted to show her a cheerier smile, “it’s not your fault you’re crying, anyone would cry being this close to the beautiful Moca-chan~”

Though she was still crying, Ran managed to laugh a little, causing Moca to smile more genuinely. Moca then pulled Ran in for a hug, guiding Ran’s head to rest against the crook of her neck. Reaching down, Moca wrapped the soft blanket around the two of them, and with that done she wrapped her arms around Ran. The vocalist felt safe and warm in Moca’s embrace, but something made her clutch onto Moca’s shirt like a lifering in a stormy sea. 

After a while like this, Ran had seemed to calm down, her tears slowing down and her breathing evening out. 

“I... I don’t know why-“ Ran tried to get her words out, but they kept getting stuck in her throat.

“It’s ok Ran,” Moca responded, her soft eyes looking down into Ran’s teary ones, “you don’t have to explain yourself. I’m here for you now.”

“I know, but...” Ran took a deep breath, her eyes closing momentarily before opening to look into Moca’s, “but why do I feel like this is all... not real?” Ran’s grip on Moca’s shirt tightened, “why do I feel like you’re going to...”

“Ran,” Moca’s voice halted Ran’s words, “it’s ok, really.”

“Stop saying that!” Ran couldn’t help but snap, her frustration at all the confusing feelings swarming inside her getting the better of her. She immediately regretted her outburst though when she saw Moca’s sad, frail smile return. “Sorry,” she quietly muttered, eyes looking down in shame.

“Ahh, Ran no, don’t apologise, it’s- I mean- urg,” Moca sighed, conflicted in picking the right words to say.

Ran sighed too, “no Moca, I’m really sorry. Today was meant to be a special day, and look at how it’s going. I just want to...” Ran took a deep breath, trying to get her words out, “I just want to make you happy today.” Though the air was still tense, Ran felt some embarrassment wash over her as a result of what she had just said.

Moca’s reply was a small smile, but its size was irrelevant, because Ran swore she could feel a wave of happiness and love radiating from it, “awww Ran, how sweet of you~” Of course Moca would pick that moment to re-adopt her teasing tone; still, that didn’t last, as her next words were spoken in a softer, almost slightly shy tone- Moca, shy? Now that was an extremely rare sight, “honestly, I just wanted to spend the day with you, and cuddling up in bed sounds really nice. Though I’d prefer it if Miss Mitake here could smile a little~”

“Pftt, alright,” Ran couldn’t help but laugh a little. She opted to lie down on the bed, pulling Moca down with her, and immediately burying her face into the guitarist’s neck. Moca was also quick to wrap her arms back around Ran, one of her hands gently brushing through the black hair.

Ran truly felt at bliss in that moment, warm and safe in Moca’s arms, surrounded by her scent that reminded her of freshly baked pastries, with a slight waft of lemon hiding in there. Lying there, the two girls forgot about the world around them, and time lost it’s meaning. Rather than focusing on the sudden pain clenching her heart, Ran let Moca’s love envelop her, feeling warm all the way from her head right down to her toes.

“Ran, I love you~”

Ran smiled, hugging Moca a bit tighter.

“I love you too, Moca.”

She wished this moment would never end.

* * *

It was many hours later that the two rose from the warm bed, so much later in fact that the light blue sky outside had turned pitch black, the fiery sun replaced by smaller, glittering stars.

“That was delicious,” Ran admitted to Moca as she sat on the sofa downstairs, just having finished eating dinner.

“See, I told you the great Moca-chan can cook~”  Moca boasted with her trademark smirk, plopping herself down next to Ran.

“Yes yes, I suppose it’s one of your goddess skills?” Ran replied, attempting a smile of her own.

“Ran, so you do understand! Yayyy, I’m so happy!” Moca threw herself at Ran, causing the two to fall backwards on the sofa, Ran, of course, complaining the whole time. Still, she found it harder and harder to care when she felt Moca’s heart beating strongly against her own chest.

The two basked in the calm atmosphere for a bit, the silence only being disrupted by a chiming sound. Looking up, Ran saw that the clock on the wall indicated it was 11.00 pm.

“Ahh, there’s only one hour left till the New Year,” Ran commented. Moca merely hummed in reply, burying her face deeper into her girlfriend’s chest. Admittedly, Ran found that slightly odd. For someone who had woken her up in the early hours of the morning to remind her of the date, she sure was acting lacklustre as the main event of the day approached. Maybe she was just tired, Ran thought, because even though they had spent all day laying in bed, this was Moca after all. Yes, that was all, so there really was no reason for a sudden wave of panic to wash over her body. This was just Moca being Moca.

Ran decided to get a conversation going by instead focusing on something more promising, “I wonder if I could write a song for what I’m feeling today?”

Moca’s looked up with a mischievous glint in her eyes, “ohhh, and what feelings may those be Raaaaan~?”

Ran felt her cheeks heating up yet again, “Moca, really...” she sighed, with Moca lightly laughing in the background.

“You’re cute Ran~”

Though her face warmed up even more, this time Ran didn’t even give Moca the satisfaction of replying to that, instead steering the conversation back on track, “well, I think such a song wouldn’t suit us anyway, I don’t know what I was thinking when I said that. Just imagine Afterglow going out on stage to suddenly sing a lov- urg.”

“Ahahaha, that would be great! I can imagine it now. You and Tomo-chin would be incredibly embarrassed and flustered, Tsugu would be too focused on being Tsugurific in playing the song and would eventually forget what the song even means, and Hii-chan... ahaha Hii-chan would not be able to contain her tears and squeaking.”

Ran couldn’t help but silently agree with Moca, that did indeed sound like them. Subconsciously, Ran’s lips curved into a smile.

“That does sound like us... the same as always indeed.”

“Of course it does, ehehe!” Moca giggled, her laughter fading slowly, and a look of fondness seeping into her features, “yep, that’s our ‘same as always’ for sure~ Our energetic Tomo-chin, our hard-working Tsugu, and our emotional Hii-chan...”

“Moca...” Ran gently ran her fingers down Moca’s face, her hands settling on her cheeks. She couldn’t help but be concerned over the sad yet fond expression on Moca’s face.

As if reading Ran’s thoughts, Moca looked up and gave Ran a wide smile, “and of course, there’s us too! The passionate, fiery Ran that appears on stage, but who is actually incredibly shy and quiet, and the incredible, skilled Moca-chan! That...” Moca moved one of her hands to lay it on top of one of Ran’s hands, eyes gazing lovingly into Ran’s, “that is our beloved, cherished Afterglow.”

“Moca...” Ran couldn’t help but tear up at Moca’s sincere words. 

“Now, now,  no more crying Ran~” Moca softly reprimanded.

“And whose fault do you think that is?” Ran replied,  no real malice in her voice. Seeking for something to distract her, Ran reached over for the TV’s remote, switching it on seeing as the New Year’s countdown would soon begin. She grimaced a bit as a loud music channel came on, a pop song blaring loudly. Quickly turning the volume down, Ran switched the channel to a news channel instead.

She was about to drop the remote and return her focus back to cuddling with Moca, but just as she was looking away her eyes caught sight of one of the headlines.

‘As the New Year approaches, New Year’s Eve is once again riddle with tragic events as people take to the streets to celebrate. This year the number of accidents occurring on this busy night had increased to-‘

Ran blinked as the screen went black. Looking down, she noticed that Moca had somehow taken the remote and switched off the TV.

“Moca?”

“Let’s not spend this nice time looking at such sad things, ok Ran~?” Moca’s voice sounded like her own, yet her eyes, which stubbornly refused to meet Ran’s, were shadowed by an emotion that Ran couldn’t decipher.

“But the New Year’s countdown will begin soon. In fact,” Ran looked up the clock, “there’s only fifteen minutes to go.”

“What?!” Ran was startled by Moca’s outburst, and had hardly any time to process it before the silver haired girl jumped off the couch and turned to face the clock. When she confirmed that the time was indeed 11.45 pm, a crestfallen look appeared on her face. Shaking slightly, Moca attempted to walk a bit away in order to hide her face.

Although Ran was surprised by Moca’s actions, she was not going to allow Moca to walk off looking so... broken. Quickly jumping to her feet, Ran reached for Moca’s wrist, turning her around to face her. But any words she had in mind vanished when she saw Moca’s face.

Moca was crying, although that verb didn’t even seem befitting. More accurately, Moca eyes and cheeks were flooded with tears, her teeth bitting down on her lips so roughly to stop them trembling that Ran was sure they’d start to bleed soon... and she was shaking, shaking so much Ran was worried her muscles would give out.

The vocalist didn’t know what to do. All day she had experienced moments of sadness and crying for some unknown reason, but Moca had been there to calm her down and reassure her through her love. And yet, here they were, Moca looking like her world was crumbling apart, and Ran couldn’t do anything but stare in shock at her.

But Ran found a trigger to set her into action, which was Moca’s quiet sobbing. Hearing the voice that was usually so cheery and positive making such devastating sounds broke Ran.

“Moca!” Ran lurched forward, trying hold the shaking girl, but Moca shook her head, moving back.

“N-NO! Y-you s-shouldn’t come n-near me Ran... not like t-this!” Moca cried out, wrapping her arms around herself, looking as if she was trying to hold herself together.

“What the hell do you mean?!” Should Ran be snapping? She wanted to help, but she didn’t know how to do that properly, “you’re here for me right?! So let me be here for you!”

Moca shook her head again, “no! I w-wanted to be here for you today, and I p-promised myself I’d make this a happy day! I just wanted you to smile and f-feel loved! And yet I’m ruining that now! God, why am I so selfish?!”

Moca fell to her knees, her hands knotting into her short hair. Ran was flabbergasted, her mind in overdrive as she tried to process those words. But one thing was frontmost of her thoughts, and she had to make sure Moca knew it.

Ran kneeled next to Moca, being slow in her actions so as to not startle the shaken up girl, “Moca, would you please look at me?” Ran softly said, but Moca shook her head, “Moca.” Eventually Moca caved in, looking up at Ran. Moca’s eyes were red and drowning in tears, which absolutely devastated Ran, but she tried to ignore that ache, choosing to gently place her hands on Moca’s face. “I’ll admit, I’m not fully sure what you’re talking about. But I need you to know, no matter what, your love has reached me.” Moca’s eyes widened, but Ran wasn’t done just yet, “I know I’m not very good at expressing my emotions, I shout and complain too much, I try to close people out, but beneath that I promise you that these precious emotions you have allowed me to experience are treasured. I love you Moca, I love you so very, very much. And that’s why I want you to trust me. I want you to trust my love, and feel like you can tell me what’s plaguing your thoughts. A relationship without breakdowns and worries... is that even a relationship? No, it’s an idolisation... a lie. Trust in my love, and let me support you like you support me... please.” Ran’s voice broke at the end, and she found herself overcome with emotion. Through her blurry eyes she did managed to see, however, Moca nodding her head.  Next thing she knew, she felt Moca burying her head into her chest, her arms griping Ran tightly. 

“Ran... I didn’t... know I...” Moca also seemed to be struggling for words, overcome with emotion too, “Thank you. Thank you so much... But... I’m afraid that when you realise what’s wrong, it’ll break you... again.”

“Moca...?” Ran  looked down at her, “I... whatever it is I’m sure I can handle it, as long as you’re by my side.”

Moca looked up at her, significantly calmer, but a small, sad smile on her face. She took a deep breath before speaking, “you see, in order to make your wish come true I thought it best to have your memories of that day, and of after, temporarily removed... I thought-  no, I knew it was the only way you’d be able to focus just on the present... you’ve always been too focused on the future and its consequences after all,” Moca giggled, though the sound had no real joy behind it.

“I... Moca, I have no idea what you’re taking about. My memories of what?”

Moca seemed hesitant to answer, but she knew she was under a time limit so she had to eventually speak up, “of New Year’s Eve- or rather, of the very early hours of New Year’s Day, of one year ago.”

“New Year’s from last year?” Ran pondered. Saying that seemed to awaken something in her, a feeling of dread, but she still didn’t know why. 

Now that she thought about it, if she tried to remember the past year she came up blank, almost like there was a gap in her memories.

Ran re-focused on Moca when she felt the silver haired girl cup her cheeks. Her eyes were teary and half lidded as she uttered three words, “Ran, it’s ok.”

Something about this scene was very familiar to Ran... very... familiar...

 

_..._

 

_A winter’s night. Ran felt herself shivering, her breath leaving her mouth in little cloud puffs. The noise of the crowd around her was overpowering, as everyone crammed around in the square in front of the large screen that announced the time._

 

_Ran tried to zone out the noise around her, focusing on the people she had come here with. Tomoe and Himari were singing loudly, while poor Tsugumi was stuck in the middle, the other two trying to rope her into singing along too. Ran couldn’t help but smile at the sight._

 

_Ran’s attention was diverted when she felt the warm hand holding hers give a squeeze. Looking next to her, Ran saw her girlfriend smiling at her, most likely having caught Ran’s rare smile. Ran felt herself blush at the amusement dancing in those blue-green eyes, but she couldn’t help but smile a bit wider at the loving expression she was being shown._

 

_“10, 9, 8-“_

 

_Ran looked up when she heard the countdown begin. She soon joined in with the crowd._

 

_“3, 2, 1..._

 

_Happy New Year!!!!”_

 

_The roar of the crowd was deafening. Out of the corner of her eye, Ran saw her three childhood friends hugging, but Ran quickly looked back down at the silver haired girl next to her._

 

_The thought of what she was about to do was seriously embarrassing, especially because they were out in public, but she wanted to make this moment special._

 

_Ran leaned down, and as she saw her girlfriend close her eyes, she too closed her own... and finally their lips met. It was a short, slow kiss, but both of the girls knew that all of their love went into that kiss._

 

_The two separated fairly soon, Ran choosing to keep her hands on her girlfriend’s cheeks. Ran smiled softly, feeling truly at bliss._

 

_“Happy New Year’s, Moca.”_

 

_“Happy New Year’s, Ran~”_

 

* * *

 

_Finally, close to 3.00 am, Ran and Moca were able to start heading home. Himari being Himari had kept the group of five out till some ungodly hour, but at long last they parted. Ran wanted to cry in joy at the thought of her exhausted body hitting her bed. Looking over at the girl holding her hand, she could tell that Moca felt the same._

 

_They were about two minutes away from Ran’s home, and it was quickly decided that Moca should just stay over at Ran’s place. Ran couldn’t help but blush a bit at the thought of Moca sleeping over at hers, but she tried to ignore the sudden pounding of her heart. She instead focused on the traffic lights of the crosswalk the pair were at, waiting to see them turn green. At long last they did, Ran grateful that they could continue their walk home. She began to step forward, tugging Moca along, who trailed behind, her sleepiness making her walk even slower than usual, if that was even possible. Ran couldn’t help but smile at that, her girlfriend was so predictable sometimes._

 

_A silent night, a smile in the dark. Oh how nice it would’ve been if things could’ve stayed like that._

 

_Sudden lights out of nowhere. The sound of tires scraping the ground. A shout that shook Ran to her core. And finally, the feel of two hands pushing on her back, her body hitting the ground... and then silence descended again._

 

_Ran groaned as she attempted to get up. She could feel something warm flowing down from the top of her head, and she was shocked to find her hands stained red when she touched the area._

 

_Shaking her head, Ran kept trying to stand up. She knew something was terribly wrong, so for God’s sake she had to stand up! Groaning even louder, she put all of her remaining energy into standing up. Once on her feet, she quickly turned around._

 

_She almost wished she hadn’t._

 

_Ran was met with the horrifying sight of a silver car smashed against the wall, having mounted the pavement opposite to her. Smoke was coming out of the engine, and the entire frontside of the car had crumbled up on itself._

 

_But Ran barely payed attention to the car, only one thing was on her mind. Only one name._

 

_“Moca!” She screamed as loud as she could, eyes frantically scanning the scene for the silver haired girl._

 

_A slight movement to her right caught her eyes. She looked over, and saw a shape moving around in the dark._

 

_Feeling her heart nearly stop, Ran quickly ran over to it. It was..._

 

_God no, it couldn’t be._

 

_How could this shape be a person at all? Limbs were either sticking out in odd shapes or were twisted unnaturally. Pieces of metal and glass were impaled all over the body. And even in the darkness one colour was distinguishably standing out... red._

 

_It was only when Ran looked at the face of the body that she finally was able to recognise the person... but oh how she wishes she hadn’t been able to._

 

_“No... God please no...” Ran whispered, eyes beginning to blur with tears. She kneeled down and, slowly, she reached out and placed her hand on the girl’s face. She refused to believe what she was seeing._

 

_But then she was met with a familiar mixture of blue and green._

 

_And that was when she was forced to admit the truth._

 

_Ran began to shake her head, slowly at first, but then frantically, her head looking as if it’d become unattached from the rest of her body at any moment now due to the force she was using._

 

_“No... no! No! No! Nonononononono- NO!!!!!!!”_

_Ran screamed at the top of her lungs, hands shaking as she attempted to hold onto Moca._

 

_“Ran...” through her screaming, Ran miraculously managed to hear the quiet voice of the girl in her arms. Looking down, Ran saw Moca looking up at her with an attempt of a smile, but it was very obvious that she was in agonising pain._

 

_“YOU IDIOT!” Ran screamed at Moca. A voice at the back of her head quietly told her that shouting at Moca now of all times was the worst idea ever, but Ran payed little attention to it, “YOU PUSHED ME! YOU IDIOT! IT WASN’T GOING TO HIT YOU! IDIOT!!!!”_

 

_Moca’s body shook a bit, probably an attempt at laughter, but the pain burning across her body didn’t really allow her to laugh, “I... had... too.”_

 

_“WHAT?!”_

 

_“I... couldn’t... just... stand... by...” Moca coughed, red fluid flowing out of her mouth._

 

_“I-I need to c-call... ambulance!” Ran shakily tried to get her phone out, but was diverted when she saw Moca shaking her head, “What the hell do you mean?! You are going to be fine, you hear me?! You’re not allowed to- to- to...”_

 

_Ran couldn’t get her words out. Moca smiled sadly._

 

_“No... you... know... already... impossible... I... feel... drifting...”_

 

_“No no no no, goddamit Moca I know you’re not good at listening to instructions but dammit you’re not allowed to go anywhere, ok?! For once in your life no sleeping, ok?!”_

 

_Ran frantically tried to keep the silver haired girl awake... but Moca’s eyes seemed to be forcing themselves shut against her will. But not yet, she had to do something first._

 

_“Ran...” Moca groaned loudly as she fought to stay awake, “Ran I... I am so... glad to have met you...” Tears formed in Moca’s eyes, she had so much she wanted to say but no energy to say it all... and she didn’t want to leave. She wanted to stay by Ran’s side so badly. She wanted to tease her until her cheeks turned into a wildfire. She wanted to play the guitar in Afterglow and keep improving. She wanted to laugh alongside Tomo-chin, Hii-chan, Tsugu... she wanted to keep working her job and laugh with Lisa-san... she wanted to eat lots more pastries... she wanted to joke around with her dad as her mum looked on fondly... she wanted to graduate, to get a proper job, to marry, to have kids, to grow older..._

 

_She wanted to live!_

 

_But she knew, she felt it that her time was almost up... and she didn’t regret this. Her time was over, but in return Ran’s would keep ticking, so she couldn’t regret her choice._

 

_Not that it had been a choice to her in the first place._

 

_But she had to make sure that she got these final few words out... she wanted Ran to know why..._

 

_“Ran... I love you... and thanks to you... I’ve been... so happy... thank you... so please... for me... live on...” she smiled a bit when she saw Ran nod her head lightly, tears still streaming down her face, her body shaking with sobs._

 

_Looking up at the eyes she had fallen deeply in love with, Moca felt at peace. She was as ready as she’d ever be._

 

_“And Ran... we’ll meet again someday... I promise... so... keep this promise... and live on... Ran...”_

 

_Moca’s eyes were almost fully closed._

 

_“It’ll be ok...”_

 

_And at last Moca felt all of the pain disappear, her heart feeling at ease as she took her final breath._

 

_Her eyes fully closed._

 

_In the distance sirens could be heard. But they seemed a million years away. All that Ran focused on was holding the lifeless body of her most loved one close to her._

 

_And then a loud scream full of agony and pain pierced the night sky._

 

_..._

 

Back in the present, Ran was shaking uncontrollably as the memories from that day almost a year ago flooded back to her. 

The day she lost Moca.

And not just of that day, but of all of this past year. Of the emptiness that followed, of her distancing herself from those who tried to help her, of her finally having to accept Moca’s departure, of the countless nights spent screaming at how unfair the world was...

Ran screamed, clutching her head. She was only able to look up when she felt warm hands holding her, refusing to let her face this alone.

Looking up, Ran saw Moca crying, but holding onto her tightly, refusing to let go of Ran. Without thinking, Ran launched herself further at her, clutching her tightly, terrified that she would suddenly disappear.

But then it hit Ran... Moca was supposed to be...

Ran leaned back, still holding onto Moca, but leaning away far enough to look at her face.

“H-how... you’re... is this a... dream?”

At that Moca was able to crack a smile. She slowly shook her head, “no, this isn’t a dream. Surely you remember now, the wish that you made on that day...”

Ran remembered. On the day of Moca’s fune- on the day everyone said their goodbyes to Moca, on that night Ran made a wish. She wished that she could see Moca just once more, she wanted a moment with her, no matter how short, just one more moment when both of them were not in pain and together and... 

“I remember,” Ran slowly said.

Moca nodded, “I know it’s late, and this is the only moment I’ll ever be able to do this, but I knew I had to. You know Ran~” Moca’s voice cracked a bit at her attempt to put on a playful tone, “I actually stuck around this entire year to look over you... I tried my best to not move on.”

“You’ve been watching over me this whole time...?” Ran couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Did that mean that Moca saw...

Moca nodded her head sadly, “I saw everything you went through. Your refusal to accept what had happened, you distancing yourself from others, your lonely suffering... I saw it all,” Moca looked away sadly, “I saw it all and yet I couldn’t help you. It nearly killed me- ahhh, bad choice of words- but yes, I was so frustrated to see you like that and not be able to do anything... until now.”

Moca gently held Ran’s hands in her own, waiting for Ran to look at her. When this was done, Moca continued, “but I’m here now. I wanted to give you that moment you wanted, a chance for us to spend a final moment together in bliss, so that’s why your memories were temporarily removed... but now that they’re back, I need you to know Ran. You’re not to blame for any of this.”

Moca’s words took Ran by surprise. 

“You’ve been thinking that it should’ve been you, right?” Moca’s prodded, but she didn’t need to receive a reply to know it was true. Nodding to herself, she carried on, “but it was my decision to do what I did, and I’ll never regret it. My only regret-“ Moca’s voice broke as she began to cry even harder, “my only regret- was to leave you behind.”

Ran also wept at those words, and the two girls tightly held onto each other. But Moca eventually had to look up, and face the truth.

“I’m afraid I don’t have long left.”

Ran followed Moca’s gaze, and saw her looking the clock. There were only two minutes left till midnight. Realisation dawned upon Ran, and she began to shake her head.

“No, no... please don’t tell me that at midnight...”

Moca nodded sadly, “my time in this world will finally be over, and I’ll be forced to move on.”

Ran didn’t want to believe it, she wanted to ignore the facts and...

She couldn’t.

Because of her insistence to hide away from the truth she had lost so much precious time already.

Moca was proud to see the change in Ran’s features as she finally accepted their fate.

“Ran, I see you’re no longer going to run. I’m glad~”

“Yes... I... it hurts so much but... but...”

Moca nodded, showing she understood what Ran meant. “Hey, Ran?”

Ran could only hum in reply, her throat tightening.

“You really are a promise-breaker, ey? So this time around I want to make sure you don’t break this promise again, ok?”

Ran wiped her eyes so she could look properly at Moca. She was surprised to see Moca holding up her hand, her pinkie sticking out.

“This time around, promise me that you’ll live a full, happy life for the both of us, alright? Pinkie promise!”

Through her tears Ran couldn’t help but laugh, but she complied, wrapping her pinkie around Moca’s, “I promise.”

Moca smiled happily.

“Moca, thank you so much for watching over me, and for giving me this day...”

“Ehehe, I feel guilty when you say it like that... after all, 50% of the reason I did that was my own selfishness.”

“Pfttt, you never change, do you?”

The girls laughed together through their tears.

Ran decided to lean in, and place a soft kiss on Moca’s lips. The kiss was returned instantaneously, and both girls made sure that all of their passion and love was clear through this fiery dance.

As they broke apart, they both noticed the time.

One minute to go...

For that one minute, the two girls held each other in silence, their bodies seeking to remember as much of the other as possible.

As the final seconds ticked away, Ran noticed Moca beginning to fade. She wanted to scream in protest, but she understood she couldn’t deny what was about to happen. And she knew she couldn’t let this precious time be wasted.

“Moca...”

“Hmmm...”

“I love you.”

As Moca finally disappeared, her face had a content smile adorning it.

“I love you too, Ran.”

The clock stroke twelve.

Outside, people were celebrating the New Year.

But inside this quiet house, a black haired girl who was crying and clutching the empty air in front of her made a quiet, yet meaningful, vow.

“I’ll live on Moca... I promise.”

* * *

Ran was awoken by a persistent, ringing sound. Groaning, she sat up, her head feeling dizzy. She took a look around the room, noticing that she had slept on her sofa all night, probably that being the reason her back ached so much.

However, Ran’s eyes were drawn to the wet spot next to where her head had been lying. That had become a familiar sight for her this past year- or should she say last year-

Oh.

Memories of last night came flooding back to her in a rush, but rather than despair Ran felt... at peace.

Yes, Ran felt at peace. For the first time in a year she was able to wake up with bright prospects ahead of her, and was able to look forward to her future.

Of course, she still felt some of that familiar pain clutching at her heart, and she understood that it would never really go away... and she didn’t want it to. This pain was proof to her that she loves Moca, so of course it would leave its mark. But the pain would become bearable, and she’d live everyday keeping to the promise she had made-

Ran was pulled out of her thoughts by that same ringing sound. She realised it was her front bell ringing, so shakily she got up to her feet and made her way to the front door.

As she was about to open her door, she heard voices from outside. Very familiar voices.

“Do you think she’s still asleep?”

“I mean, at this time? Most likely.”

“I don’t care! I’m going to keep ringing this bell until she opens the door. Our last resort will be to have Tomoe kick it down.”

“Himari-chan, we can’t do that!”

Signing, Ran opened the door, “I agree with Tsugumi. Don’t go deciding to kick down other people’s doors.”

Three pairs of eyes turned to stare at her for an uncomfortably long amount of time, until-

“Ran!!!”

Ran nearly fell backwards when she was tackled into a hug by Himari.

“Alright, alright! Please stop!” Ran grumbled, embarrassed.

“No! I’m not letting you go! Ever!” Ran could see tears flowing down Himari’s cheeks, and when she looked up she saw Tsugumi crying too, while Tomoe was bitting her lower lip looking on the verge of tears herself.

Ran sighed again, but this time it was a contented sigh, “why don’t you guys come in?”

A few minutes later the four girls were settled in Ran’s living room. A long silence befell the room as each girl thought of what to say. It was Tsugumi who first broke the silence.

“So, Ran-chan, how have you been?” Tsugumi asked carefully, not wanting to push the vocalist too far. Ran noticed, and she couldn’t blame her, after all Ran had been the one to distance herself from them.

“I’ve been... alright,” Ran replied, nodding.

“That’s good!” Tsugumi replied, a bright smile on her face. It was obvious though that it was a bit forced.

“Ran listen,” Ran wasn’t surprised to hear Tomoe speak up, she always had been a straight to the point girl, “today... well we wanted to come check on you. We know we haven’t tried enough to support you, and, well-“

“Tomoe,” Ran interrupted, “and Himari and Tsugumi too. You’re not to blame for anything,” Ran took a deep breath, and turned to face her childhood friends, “it was me who distanced myself from you all. I blamed myself for what happened, and I was in a terrible amount of pain... I know you were all hurting too, but I tried to ignore that and secluded myself away. I’m so sorry for that.”

The other three girls were left speechless. Ran smiled slightly at the sight, before standing up and walking over to stand in front of the three of them.

“If you guys will allow me to, I’d like to make it up to you all. Please, let me redeem myself,” Ran bowed low to them. Due to her position, she was unprepared when a certain someone tackled her into a hug.

“Raaaaaaan, you don’t even have to ask!” Himari wailed, tears already flowing down from her eyes as she clung tightly to Ran. She was soon joined by Tsugumi, who hugged her other side.

“Ran-chan, as Himari-chan said, you don’t even need to ask! We’ll be here for you always!”

Finally, Ran felt a warm hand on top of her head, and looking up she saw Tomoe smiling down at her, “of course we’ll accept you back Ran... but to us you never really left.”

Surrounded by the warmth of her friends, Ran allowed herself to cry with them. 

After what felt like hours, but had only actually been a few minutes, the four detached themselves from one another, knowing in their hearts their bond was strong.

As she was thinking this, Ran noticed a bouquet of flowers laying on the side. Noticing her gaze, Tsugumi spoke up, “ahh, Ran-chan, actually we were planning to go visit her today. After all today is...”

Ran nodded, knowing what Tsugumi meant, “it’s her one year anniversary.”

The three girls shared a look, and this time Himari was the one to speak up, “would you come with us, Ran?” Again, Himari had the careful tone in her voice that Tsugumi had adopted earlier. 

Ran merely smiled in reply, and nodded her head, “I’d love to come. Perhaps afterwards we could go to Tsugumi’s cafe and talk too?”

The three girls looked both amazed and overjoyed at the same time. All three rushed to agree, tripping over their words in their hurry. Ran couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight.

“Well then, I’ll go get ready. I’ll be a few minutes.”

Ran left her friends to head towards her bedroom. Looking back, she saw them talking to each other with smiles on their faces. It warmed Ran’s heart to be surrounded by her friends once again.

Ran was about to walk up the stairs, but she paused as her gaze drifted to a nearby window. Looking out, Ran saw an endless blue sky stretching out.

‘Moca, I know you’ve moved on now, but wherever you are, know that I’m prepared to move on too.

I’ll never forget you. You truly changed my life, and have lit up my world in so many ways. I’ll always love you, and always treasure you in my heart.

Thank you so much for loving me, and for allowing me to love you.’

Ran wiped away a stray tear from her eye, choosing instead to smile.

“I won’t ever forget our promise.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh that was such a ride of emotions! I myself cried while writing this if I’m being honest. I love Mocaran, but when I wrote this I was feeling stressed and emotionally exhausted from exams soooo I decided to write an angsty story about my favourite ship! 
> 
> I mentioned above that I created this account to post this story, but I’ve been familiar with the site as a guest for a while. I’d really like to keep writing some stories to share here, though no promises at the moment as I’m still stuck in exams! It’s definitely something I’ll keep in mind though!  
> ^-^
> 
> Sorry if the story felt a bit rushed and weird, but I hope you enjoyed it anyway!
> 
> Thanks for reading! <3


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